5 Reasons why mothers suffer from the anger of their children
Do you sometimes have the impression that your children behave in an angelic way with other people, while they behave like real monsters with you? You do not dream! Children do tend to throw tantrums when they are in the presence of their mother. But don’t worry: this does not mean that you have failed as a parent, quite the contrary! That’s a big compliment, as the following 5 causes of tantrums will show.
They feel safest with their mom.
It is usually with their mother that children feel most secure. With their mother, they float in a kind of security bubble, in which they can be completely themselves and get rid of their emotional weight. Because they know that mom’s love and support are unconditional. During temper tantrums, children also show their most vulnerable side. A side that only reveals itself in the event of great confidence!
They need more attention from their mom.
As a general rule, the mother is the most important reference person for a child. As soon as they feel like they have to share their mother’s attention, whether it’s with siblings, dad, pets, or work, they try to win back their mother’s full attention using temper tantrums. Even if it gets them in trouble, they still get the desired and desired attention.
They test their limits with their mom.
It is quite natural for a child to test the limits. Since the little ones know that the relationship with their mother is safe, it is easier for them to go crazy with her, disobey her and see where exactly their mother’s limits are. This doesn’t mean that your child deliberately wants to upset you, just that he is developing normally and establishing a healthy relationship with you.
Good manners require a lot of concentration from children.
Behaving properly is tiring for children. It takes a lot of energy for them to control their impulses and wisely follow all the rules given to them throughout the day. As soon as they get home, they let out everything they’ve repressed and accumulated during the day. Mom’s temper tantrums are therefore a form of relaxation and stress relief for the little ones.
They want to manipulate their mom.
Admittedly, this point may not be a compliment, but it is nevertheless a normal development of the child. In some cases, children do indeed use their temper tantrums as a manipulative strategy to get what they want. However, it is easy to distinguish real tantrums from manipulations, because manipulations always have a rational and logical purpose, while natural emotional outbursts rarely seem to have a logical reason. But you are supporting manipulative behavior by giving your child what they want, your child will use this strategy over and over again because after all, it works.
When kids go crazy with their mom, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve failed as a parent. Much more often this means that you do everything right as a mother and that the child develops healthily and feels good so that he can be fully himself. If your child is having another emotional tantrum, try to look on the bright side: he knows your love for him is unconditional. It doesn’t matter if he is sometimes cheeky 😉